Girl Child

A cross section of Nigerians have expressed worry over the increasing rate of child marriages in the country.

Indeed, the elite in society among several others are to blame for this disturbing trend which has gained ground in an unspecified number of communities. Why is this so ? In this interview, the Founder, Spiritual Head and Grand Imam of Shafaudeen-in-Islam Worldwide, Prof. Sabitu Olagoke opines that there are a lot of dangers involved in child marriages just as he warns parents to shun the act. Excerpts :

Child marriage is on the increase in Nigeria today, why is this so ?

A minor in marriage is morally wrong, rejected in the religions of the world and considered to be anti-social. It is equally regarded as a human aberration medically.

Fundamentally, marriage is best consummated for sound minds, who can take decisions on their own, and matured minds who can be regarded as rational in decision making.

For a minor in marriage, coercion is the tool, and this does not consider the fundamentals of love as basic to two different people, male and female coming together as husband and wife.

The institution of marriage states that the two to be involved in marriage must have done a detailed assessment in the process of wooing each other, based on certain considerations of natural importance : beauty, parental wealth, academic pedigree and probably religion.

Of any of the four chosen, there must have been a time lapse, regarded as courtship period for the two to understudy their areas of strength,weaknesses, opportunities and threats.

And in this modern time, counseling must predominate and extend to personality traits compatibility as well as blood group and genotype class to determine a hitch free union.

Parental consent then follows, before witnesses and people are called for the socio-spiritual ceremony.

Love, passion as well as acceptable character or attitude are equally considered.

However, under a minor involved marriage, the above considerations are absent, while the influences cuts across parental influences based on business consideration.

On the other hand, way ward and reckless lifestyles leading to unavoidable pregnancies could force parents to organize for a minor involved marriage, perhaps to save face of for the girl child to have a good care under the roof of the elderly man.

Minor involved in marriage could lead to Vesico-vaginal fistula(VVF) and in another breadth it could be disgusting to the growing girl child and this could result in serious attempt's by the girl to kill the husband, who she may develop hatred for because of his oppressive tendencies and the lack of love in the relationship.

The health of the minor under forced marriages may result in serious medical conditions and unfortunately, the man involved goes about unhurt in search of another victim.

It is also unfortunate that most of those involved belong to the elite class, who most of the times equally claim to know so much about their religion.

But alas, we must not forget the fact that all religions teach morals and are strictly against one inflicting injuries on the other.

This is a period where the whole world now clamors for equality of access and treatment to the boy and girl child. And that the girl child and women generally, must always be spared from agonies of maltreatment such as domestic violence, are, pedophilia and other forms of sexual abuse.

Proverbially, when we eat unripe fruits, we plunge ourselves into the problem of stomach ache.

So also marriage to a minor is bereft of any pleasure, respect and care. Hence, the right of such a girl to have access to good education and have a successful career life is already in jeopardy.

All women have values which must not be destroyed by the selfish desire of men.

A girl in a forced marriage has already lost a promising future of good growth profile and development.

Her God given talents are already torn into shreds, while society will remain at a loss due to this practice.

This is why several countries that had earlier been into this practice, are making changes by shifting the minimum age for marriage to 18 years old for their girl child.

At this, level of growth, the pelvic girdle is strong enough to carry the load or pressure of pregnancy.

The child at this age is expected to have acquired a minimum certificate of Nigeria’s Senior Secondary School Certificate standard. This implies that she can take decisions that may be favorable to her and her future, even when she finds herself in the web of a love tango.

Parents need to be properly educated on the issue of the need to protect the interest of their children, most especially the girl child.

Child rearing must follow a universal guiding code of value, protection, safety, respect, inclusion, attention and freedom.

If we are able to follow this valuable guidance in child rearing,cases of incest, rape, pedophilia and minor involved in marriage would never arise.

The girl child is a valuable better half and must be treated equally like their male counterparts.

Circumstances wherein men work and women stay at home to cater for the home and children, is no longer in vogue as the running of the home is now a joint responsibility of the husband and wife in an environment of career driven development.

We must therefore, avoid minor involved marriages to respect the divine institution of marriage as supported by our culture and all our religions including Islam and Christianity.

Besides this, we must consider the health challenges that may accompany minor involved marriages, to safe guard the girl child.

Instead there is a need to pursue the cause of women emancipation to be voices to be reckoned with in society and for each nation to be able to achieve in the areas of 35 per cent affirmative action for women at the various decision making points.

Only women, who are not abused, but supported in the cause of their growth and development without truncated period of minor involved in marriage , can be supported to achieve the various international opportunities open for their advancement.

A nation accomplishing this, would be regarded to be fair in the competitive world of global best practices. Nigerians must say no to Child Marriage.